Jumpin Jack Flash is a gas gas gas
Does anyone else meet these people or does God reserve them for me?
So I pull into the mini mart to get some gas. At the pump next to me is a guy whose tag says "72MPGOMG". Some sort of hybrid. The conversation goes something like this:
EcoNazi: (looking at my Corvette like it's something he scraped off his shoe) I get 72 miles per gallon.
Me: OK
EN: What do you get?
Me: Huh? I dunno, 12?
EN: Those things should be illegal.
Me: (Blinking). Speechless. Hoping he'll go away.
EN: (Clearly agitated) Do you know how big your carbon footprint is?
Me: I don't even know what my carbon footprint is. (Wondering why the pump is so damn slow.)
EN: (About to have some sort of neurological episode) You're destroying the planet!!!!
Me: (Fatigued) Yeah - I'm ok with that - I don't need it for much longer.
EN: You!? What about the future? I want to leave my kids a better place.
Me: You have kids? Somebody had sex with you?
EN: (Melting down) You are an ass!!!
Me: (Deciding that 7.213 gallons is really all I need for now) Yeah - I'm OK with that too. Have a nice day Skippy.
I drove off and heard him ranting something about Obama and hot tubs. I tried to make the connection for a while but nothing pretty was coming so I just let it go and put on some Bob Marley. Like I said I didn't get topped off, but I can go back tomorrow. I figure if he gets 72 MPG, how often can he be in the gas station?
So I pull into the mini mart to get some gas. At the pump next to me is a guy whose tag says "72MPGOMG". Some sort of hybrid. The conversation goes something like this:
EcoNazi: (looking at my Corvette like it's something he scraped off his shoe) I get 72 miles per gallon.
Me: OK
EN: What do you get?
Me: Huh? I dunno, 12?
EN: Those things should be illegal.
Me: (Blinking). Speechless. Hoping he'll go away.
EN: (Clearly agitated) Do you know how big your carbon footprint is?
Me: I don't even know what my carbon footprint is. (Wondering why the pump is so damn slow.)
EN: (About to have some sort of neurological episode) You're destroying the planet!!!!
Me: (Fatigued) Yeah - I'm ok with that - I don't need it for much longer.
EN: You!? What about the future? I want to leave my kids a better place.
Me: You have kids? Somebody had sex with you?
EN: (Melting down) You are an ass!!!
Me: (Deciding that 7.213 gallons is really all I need for now) Yeah - I'm OK with that too. Have a nice day Skippy.
I drove off and heard him ranting something about Obama and hot tubs. I tried to make the connection for a while but nothing pretty was coming so I just let it go and put on some Bob Marley. Like I said I didn't get topped off, but I can go back tomorrow. I figure if he gets 72 MPG, how often can he be in the gas station?
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